The Biggest Loser League

there is nothing i can think of as sad or happy as a loved one leaving this world. i know it may sound morbid. but i'm happy for those who have gone on before us because they are no longer in pain, all the things they could not do they are able to do now. and of course it is always sad that they have to die in order to achive this. i work in a nursing home and you would think that it is no big thing people die everyday. but it is a big thig maybe not to us but to someone else. a husband, or wife, adult children, sisters, brothers, grandchildren, a caregiver, it mattered to someone. familys are such a strange web of beings. you are born into a family and thats it unless there are cercumstances. but the dinamics of the family is what is so distressing to outsiders. not all familys are the Cleaver type familys, or the Brady bunch type, most may be like Rosanne and Dan Conner's family, otheres are worse. but when do you let go of all the crap.????? I'M SORRY for going on and on. but we had a couple in our home that were togather for 68yrs. tuesday the husband past. their children came in told their mother then left. made the arragments with out her took her to the wake but NOT TO THE FURNERAL. they could not be bothered to come pick up their mother to say her final farwell to her husband of 68 yrs, her love, her strength. i'm sorry maybe i am not seeing something that they do but could you not put away your petty differeces for just a short time and see they are human and have feelings to. this poor woman has lost her husband they could not take the time to console her and love her? how could they do that to her, as she sits in her room broken hearted.

  so i start this week at 215lbs. wow. and i am getting back to the basic's, i have put them off for awhile. but i see it is time to bring them back. just slowly.

 that's right yesterday was hubby's b-day. had a nice quite dinner with our neighbors, spag & meatball, salad, garlic bread and ice cream cake. he was very suprised. he did not want a party, but i just can not help myself. i'm just a party planing animal. it's all about having fun. i was very good i had a single serv of spag & meatballs, a nice serving of salad, yea i did have the garlic bread, but i had no cake. not a big chocolate person. sorry.lol i had a fruit salad instead.

well another holiday done and gone. hope everyone had a great time. me? i worked .  spoke to my youngest son his battallion left for Cal for a month of intensive training.  my oldest son informs us he want to come home. if he doesn't find a place before the end of july. and in the mean time our youngest son's girlfriend is suppose to move in until he gets back( not from Cal) from his first tour of duty.  we have a very small 2 bdrm apt. it's 3 1/2 rooms , 2 bdrm's a sm livingrm, and the bathrm and kitchen area make up the half. where am i gonna put everyone???  i have to give up my workout room either way. so sucks!!! well hopefully this week will be better

 WOW WRITE ABOUT MY EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCE?????:  OK LETS SEE---- MY EMOTIONAL JOURNEY HAS BEEN A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE.  THERE HAS BEEN DAYS THAT HAVE BEEN SO GOOD EVEN IF I HAD LOST ONLY A Pd,OR HAD NOT HAD A WT LOSS. THEN THERE ARE DAYS THAT I FEEL SO DEPRESSED I DO NOT WANT TO GET OUT OF BED, AND I FEEL LIKE CRYING OR SOOO TIRED TO THE POINT I WOULD FALL ASLEEP TYPING (NOT EASY), AND I KNOW IT'S THEN I REALLY NEED SOMEONE TO GIVE ME A GOOD SWIFT BOOT TO GET ME TO MOVE. EXERCISE IS SUPPOSE TO RELEASE ENDORPHINES THAT MAKE YOU FELL BETTER. THAT ALONE SHOULD BE ENOUGH OF A REASON TO CONTINUE TO WORKOUT. IT'S THE INSPRATION I GET FROM MY TEAM MATES THAT KEEP ME GOING. WHETHER IT'S A 60+ MATE RUNNING A RACE AND FINISHING FIRST IN HER DIVISION, A TEAM MATE NEAR HER 100LB LOSS,OR EVEN A NEW TEAM MATE JUST JUMPING RIGHT IN FEET FIRST INTO  OUR CHELLENGE, I STILL DO NOT LIKE WHAT I SEE IN THE MIRROR.BUT I CAN TOLERATE HER MORE NOW. MY GOAL HERE IS TO SEE THE PESON WITHIN, WATCH AS SHE TAKES OFF HER FAT SUIT. OH WHAT JOY AND AND CELABRATION WILL BE!!!!